The Herald got the experts to help solve some of the most common issues people have faced at work.

My co-worker has bad body odour, another uses too much cologne. How do I tell them?

Yes, it may be an awkward conversation, but sometimes it’s just better to rip the Band-Aid off – privately.

If a colleague has bad body odour or their cologne is too strong, politely tell them and suggest a solution.

“If you can identify how it’s impacting on you, that’s [when] people tend to be more willing to change their behaviour. People generally want to help,” chartered organisational psychologist John Eatwell says.

“If we can turn whatever our problem is from the accusation into ‘here’s an opportunity you can help me’, the more responsive people are.”

Ainsley Palairet of FixHR says when it comes to the hygiene question, policies around personal presentation can help take the edge off, but even then, it still requires a human conversation.

“I would recommend you keep it private, kind and clear: ‘This is a bit awkward to raise, but I wanted to let you know there’s a strong scent at the moment that’s noticeable in shared spaces’.”

She says, where possible, these conversations are best handled by someone with seniority, simply because of the power dynamics involved.

I’m constantly getting frustrated at work. Am I in a toxic environment?

Even though you might feel down after a bad day, it’s important to realise the difference between a toxic work culture and a general lack of communication, our experts say.

“Toxic can mean a number of things, but generally it culminates when a person feels alienated or is made to feel like they don’t belong,” Eatwell says.

“It can be a myriad of things, like people greeting everybody else in the office in the morning and not them, or not opening the door for them but doing it for everybody else.”

Hurtful and unprofessional criticism is also another factor.

“That feeling where there’s animosity towards people, I think, would be the best description [of toxic]“.

He says the best way to address these issues is simple: sit down and talk through your issues.

“Sometimes it can be very minor things that seem a bit trivial, like when people don’t say good morning, but the key thing is to say this is having an impact on me.”

Palairet, however, warns a few bad days in the office does not always mean a toxic work culture.

“Toxic work cultures are about patterns and unless your manager or boss is part of those unhelpful patterns, they are likely as aware as you are,” she says.

“If people feel unsafe speaking up, if behaviour goes unchecked, or if you find yourself constantly explaining things away to make others feel okay, that’s when culture is becoming problematic.”

I feel like I’m due for a pay rise. How do I ask my boss?

Timing and expectations are important when it comes to conversations about pay, Palairet says.

“Take into consideration the pressure your boss is likely under with the economy and fuel prices being what they are.”

She says a strong starting point is talking about how your role has grown and whether your pay reflects that change.

It’s also worth coming prepared with specifics about what has changed since your current pay was set, what you are accountable for now and examples of the value you bring to the organisation.

“People will do all they can to retain great staff. And there are more ways of doing that than just adding a dollar to an hourly rate. Open the conversation honestly and see what might eventuate,” Palairet says.

I’m feeling micromanaged and want to quit

Both experts say a feeling of being micromanaged often sticks with employees because people flag it as a problem. A simple way to remedy this is to talk to your manager.

“There’s a whole lot of research that says the more you can ask questions, the more you get the person thinking. The more you can actually get the other person talking, the more likely they are to be receptive to that and to change their behaviour,” Eatwell says.

“The more you can turn whatever your problem is into a question, the better off you are.”

But stay positive. Allowing your frustration to turn the office into a passive-aggressive warzone won’t help anyone, Palairet says.

“Instead of pushing back directly, look for ways to build confidence, like getting ahead of updates, being clear on outcomes and showing ownership.”

Work is making me burnout. What do I do?

Simply trying to pretend stress isn’t happening is not the way to go.

“We bottle it up and bottle it up and get angry about it and then we explode at our manager or a team worker,” Eatwell says.

Instead, speaking to your manager as soon as possible can help clear the way and make room for better solutions.

“The more we can lean in and address things early, the better.”

But what about the age-old problem of venting to your colleagues to blow off steam? Is this okay?

“If you look at the research on venting, the more we vent, the less people trust us and the person we’re venting about,” Eatwell says.

“Venting sticks to you as well as who you’re complaining about, so you’ve got to be pretty careful about who you vent to and what you vent about.”

Someone keeps putting fish in the microwave. And the fridge stinks. Do I say something?

The key to dealing with all of these challenges is being upfront about them early and raising them in a respectful manner, even if it might be awkward.

It can be hard, but waiting to deal with them when they have escalated can be more difficult.

“I think the human tendency is to kind of lean out of conflict and generally that exacerbates things,” Eatwell says.

“When we lean out of conflict, we don’t say anything until we get really angry, or we don’t say anything until we have to talk to HR. The idea is that the more we can lean into it with compassion and curiosity, the better off we are.”

It’s also important to remember that everything is relative, Palairet says.

“If humour fits your workplace, it can help, but keep it respectful. The goal is to improve the space, not embarrass anyone.

“Are you comfortable saying, ‘Can we agree on clearing out the fridge weekly, so it stays usable for everyone?’ That’s a reasonable request for a shared environment. Remember to frame it as a shared environment, not a personal criticism.”

Mitchell Hageman joined the Herald’s entertainment and lifestyle team in 2024. He previously worked as a multimedia journalist for Hawke’s Bay Today.