This study began 20 years ago, but a recent Instagram post by former Australian paramedic Nikki Jurcutz suggests it remains a common experience.
The Melbourne mum now owns Tiny Hearts Education, teaching parents first aid information, but moments with dying patients calling out for their mother have stuck with her, even years after calling time on the profession.
“I heard it myself a handful of times, and those moments have stayed with me for years,” Jurcutz told news.com.au.
“It’s been reported in soldiers dying on battlefields, in hospices, and in palliative care, across different countries and different decades, in every language. That’s what makes it so amazing. It’s not tied to one type of person or one part of the world. It seems to be something in all of us.”
A specific moment with an elderly woman who died while she was on a job still stays with her.
“When she said it, it didn’t sound like she was calling out for her mum. It sounded like a statement, almost like she was seeing her,” Jurcutz recounted.
“Like the two of them were being reunited rather than her reaching for someone who wasn’t there. I will never forget that moment.”
In the social media post, many commenters shared their own experience with their dying loved ones.
“My dad did this in palliative care. He was in so much pain, even in his sleep, that he called out for his mum. We found comfort in the idea that perhaps nana was there to take him home,” one commenter revealed.
Another shared: “I’ll never forget my Nanna calling out for her Mum in her final moments.”
“This is true. When my older brother died from a drug overdose, even though him and my mum lost contact for years, he still called out for her during his final moments,” a third wrote.
Others reflected on their own experience as a mother, remarking on the powerful insight Jurcutz had shared.
“Reading those was the moment it really hit me. This isn’t just something I saw on the road. It’s something so many people have quietly lived through with the people they love, and it’s the same every time,” Jurcutz said.
“To me that’s a reminder of how special the role of a mum is. You’re the first safe place your child ever knows, and you stay their safest place right to the end.”
Thea McCroary has worked in palliative care for 18 years and believes there’s a lot of grace in our final moments.
“You go back to some of your happiest memories,” the COO of Prestige Inhome Care told news.com.au.
“It shows right up until the very end that people, and mothers in particular … are still caring for others.”
In her experience, watching a loved one call out for their mother can aid in the grief for those who are left behind.
“Families are fearful of losing them, but there’s some comfort knowing they have someone with them, or that they’re feeling connected to their mum,” she explained.
She believes that the act of calling out for a loved one is a reminder of what is important.
“You don’t ever hear anyone saying they wish they worked more,” she said.
“When it strips back at the end, the last words are often about who they loved and who loved them in return.”
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