That was Jack’s comment to Jonathan after Lauren attacked him, accusing him of saying he didn’t find his wife Tori attractive.

Tonight’s episode of Married At First Sight was a stark reminder that not only is misogyny is alive and well, and plenty of men (in fact all the men on the show) don’t feel like they can or should stand against it. A woman was the target of an attack, and not a single man stood by her and supported her.

Muzzle your woman. Let’s unpack this multi-layered onion of a statement for a second, shall we?

First of all, there’s the fact that Jack didn’t even lower himself to addressing Lauren; he asked her husband to shut her up, to get his woman under control.

And then there’s the dog reference, which expert John Aitken spelled out to Jonathan.

“What’s the inference when you say to a man ‘put a muzzle on that woman’?” he asked.

“A dog,” Jonathan mumbled, full of shame.

And finally, there’s the fact that Jonathan didn’t stand up for his wife.

“She spoke up, she’s called a dog. You weren’t upset by it,” John said.

“It’s not good enough. She is your wife. If someone said that to me about my wife, I would not back down. I would come out full throttle, guns blazing. When the pressure came on last night, you folded, and you weren’t the only one.”

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Experts rant about men not standing up for women

There’s a line in a WB Yeats poem that goes, “The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity”. That’s exactly what was going on when Jack disrespected Lauren.

Jack had the power to say whatever he wanted, and not a single one of the guys had the conviction to take a stand against him.

“Can I ask the men here tonight, why did you stay silent after that comment?” John demanded.

Everyone looked down, staring hard at their hands.

Jack slammed by experts for muzzle comment

Then Jack was in the hot seat.

“I’ve heard some things in these experiments that have repulsed me, but that was one of the worst I’ve ever heard,” John continued.

Expert Mel Shilling jumped in.

“When you made that comment, what do you think that said about you?” she asked Jack.

“Nothing nice. I’ve lost sleep over it. I’m ashamed,” he replied before apologising to the room, but never apologising directly to Lauren.

Mel turned to Jack’s wife Tori.

“He’s showing you who he is as a man, what he does under pressure, and he’s showing you his attitude towards women.”

“I don’t agree with that,” Tori defended her husband. “When you’re in a heightened state of anger, you say what’s in your head. It’s not natural for Jack to talk like that.”

“It seemed very natural. It seemed like a reflex.”

Through all the scolding and lecturing, Jack looked appropriately contrite. It seemed the self-described “alpha-male” accepted being put in his place.

But how long will that feeling last when all the people around him seem to support his behaviour? The judges and the audience might not like it, but none of his mates stood up to him, and his wife defended him. Apparently telling a man to muzzle his wife is socially acceptable, and we guarantee Jack will continue with the behaviour until Tori final sees the light and writes “Leave” on her card.

Originally published as “I’ve heard things in this experiment that repulsed me, but this is the worst’